Bad news equal eating?

(originally posted 19/08/09)

My main problem (and I think this is the main reason I have this major problem) is that I am an 'overeater'. An emotional overeater.

Like today I started okay, in good mood, excited for starting another healthy day without any 'dark thoughts' (like I choose bad food and skip exercise because I'm lazy). Then midday I received some bad news (more of something which made me mad and confused). I immediately thought of eating. (!!!) Like right now I would go to the supermarket, buy some cookies and stuff, and screw this 'I'm going to lose weight' thing. But I tried to resist to the temptation. I finished my work, and then I hopped on the indoor bicycle for a 40 minute exercise. Later I had lunch so I tought that then the hunger would go away. A couple hours later though the 'dark thoughts' came back. Especially when I saw the Nesquik Cocoa in the cupboard and immediately had a random thought to make pancakes.

I don't want to be so strict with my diet so that I can not keep up with it. I know myself, I've been there. Extremes are dangerous for me because I either starve myself or overeat so much junk I would be even embarressed to admit it. When I'm in a situation described above it is never about just one cookie. Or one chocholate bar. It's more, like one (or two) whole bag of something, and I probably drink soda instead of water.

So instead of giving in for the 'dark thoughts' I ate 4 peaches. I didn't want to starve myself and wait till dinner because I'm 100 percent sure that would end up real bad, like going to the supermarket after all.

I'm okay now. But I'm telling you, finding the balance is one hell of a big struggle.