The scale

(originally posted 13/08/09)

I needed to know my 'starting weight' so today morning I collected all my courage and stepped on the scale. Funny thing happened first. The batteries were low so I spent 5 minutes figuring out how I could weigh myself. When I turned it on it was okay but as soon as I tried to measure my weight the numbers started to increase and close to the 'final number' it said 'low batteries'. I almost gave up. But somehow I figured out how I could trick the scale and it worked. The scale showed 82.9kg / 182.7lbs.

I have to confess it made me sad because somehow I believed I would have been closer to 80 instead of closer to 85. It is almost the highest weight I could remember, also considering the fact that I was 72kg this January. Kind of scary and disappointing. But I know the saying 'you don't gain it overnight nor can you likewise lose it'. It's just the fact that last time I put a real effort in losing the weight I was much lighter and it did seem an adventure. Now first I have to get rid of 10kg (which I have experience how much work). And to tell the truth even 10kg sound scary to me. That's so much. I know these are all on me, I can only blame myself. I think I just have to accept that this situation I am in right now not the same I was in two years ago. So I have to handle it accordingly.